The secret step in storytelling that is so often forgotten
Discussions about storytelling can be like the three tenors. They nearly always only focus on the first two parts of the craft.
1. Perfecting the story we tell.
2. Impacting the story these people will tell others.
But there’s a third part which is absolutely critical to mastering the art, and the more efficient you can become in recognising this, the more effective you will be in using storytelling to move people to action.
3. Learning how to understand people’s worldviews and recognising the stories they tell themselves.
We all have that uncle who tells the same inappropriate story at every table, sometimes it’s a hit, sometimes it’s a disaster. Why?
We all have that uncle who tells the same inappropriate story at every table, sometimes it’s a hit, sometimes it’s a disaster. Why?
It’s because so often the focus on storytelling is around consistency, but what is equally important is context. The very best storytellers often spend far less time ‘telling’ and much more time listening, and this is why point 3 is so pivotal to enable you to read the room.
The uncle’s internal narrative is simple. He is the unmovable speaker of truth.
“I don’t change for anyone” is a line I’m sure we’ve all heard him say. For some this style resonates, for others it grates and grinds, why is this approach so polarising?
When we listen to a story, we subconsciously consider whether what we are being told reinforces our own worldview, to inform how we should respond.
Put simply, we are trying to work out whether ‘people like us, do things like this.’
If the answer is no, we’re likely to resist, retaliate, or retreat.
This process is something we are constantly doing as we sort things into groups, searching for others who share a similar worldview and internal narrative, and seeking opportunities that will strengthen our status within these tribes.
So how do we get better at recognising people’s worldviews, and the story they tell themselves?
The most important skill required to become more efficient and effective in understanding those around us, is empathy and a genuine commitment to engage (real listening, curious questioning, and being truly present in the conversation.)
Ask yourself, how does this person (or group) view the world and their role in it. What are their drivers, their purpose, and how might this impact the way I shape the story I am about to share?
For the uncle it’s a one size fits all approach, but there’s a much more powerful and effective way.
Find the tension.
So often discussions around storytelling simply focus on connection, but we are all selling something, so how can storytelling help us move those we are connecting with to action?
When you understand how someone sees themselves in the world, storytelling can help you creates the tension a person requires to act.
Strategic silence is your secret weapon. Practice it, play with it, reframe your fears around it, as it’s the final step in storytelling and your most powerful tool is your using storytelling for sales.
The person who prides themselves on being the ‘powerful impulsive decision-maker’ requires a very different narrative to the ‘careful considerer’ who needs to feel like they’ve assessed all the facts before acting. The bargain hunter who doesn’t like to miss out, feels time pressure likely more than both. All have their own worldviews and internal narrative, and will respond very differently to the same story, so consider how you might use their worldview to shape where you start.
Silence to seal.
perfecting the story we tell and impacting the story these people will tell others is where we all nearly always focus on to craft a story. but there’s a third part which is absolutely critical to mastering the art of storytelling.